MAD FIGS Digest #2-2: 2/26/98

Gosh, I love the beginning of a new semester! Nobody ever assigns big projects until at least the second month, so I have lots of free time to sleep, watch movies, and, most importantly, UPDATE THE WEB PAGE!

2/26- Added MAD FIGS Photo Gallery! I have figured out how to use the scanner here, and the Animal has also sent me many historic photos. Check it out today!
Added a cool postcard from vinnardo
Updated Missions Section: I've finally finished this classic part of the webpage. Now you can read about ALL the MAD FIGS missions! (sort of)
Added photos all over the place (all are indexed at the photo gallery):
(I told you I have a lot of free time on my hands)


In an extremely disturbing move, Pepsi has released a new television commercial featuring... CANADIAN GEESE! This is the worst thing to happen to mass media since "Fly Away Home" was released! I have decided to stop drinking Pepsi products until the commercial is taken off the air, and I encourage everyone else to do the same. Maybe we can get Andrew to talk to the Pepsi guy for us...?

If you have any questions, comments, or wish to be unsubscribed, send email to

Scott Dogg


"There's nary an Animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman!"
-Groundskeeper Willie

"Men have let me down, but Animals, never. Never!"
-Madame Renee in 'Chacun cherche son chat'

Dr. Teeth: Oh yeah, that's Animal. Show 'em what you do, Animal!
Animal: I what do! Eat drums! Rarrrrgh! [eats drums]
-The Muppet Movie

"I may be a stupid, fouled-up twentieth-century son of a bitch, but I'm no Animal."
-J.D. Salinger, "Nine Stories"

Captain Doyle: "Don't be so fast to thank me on this, Luger, because you're going to be naked on this one. It's on the line for you. People are going to be watching. Now you blow it, you're going down. You screw up, you're going to be hung out to dry. You drop the ball, you're going tobe left twisting in the wind. If you embarrass this department, your pants will be dancing with FIGS. Is that clear?"
Luger: "Everything except for the dancing with FIGS part!"
-National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1

"MADness is a state that depends upon the heat of the blood, not upon the will."
-Paul Holbach, "The Illusion of Free Will"

"There is... no difference betweem the man that is cast out of the window by another, and the man who throws himself out of it... that which determines the fall of the second case springs from within his own peculiar machine."

"What the fuck is up with declaring a day for yourself anyway? on principle it's just sketchy. oh and the other day my russian culture prof said that peter the great was 'a fig of the antichrist' and i thought about it all day and i still have no idea what that meant. i think i'm getting stupider by the second."

> edoc ni egassem a sdnes hsalF ehT
> I am always with you. The mission is proceeding as planned. I miss you
> guys a lot. But I'm doing OK. ! hsalF ehT
> P.S. The Web Page is Amazing... It's reaching it's potential in a very
> big way.
-Jacob Ekens, February 21, 1998

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