JSA

The "Junior Statesmen of America" or JSA, is a nationwide organization that encourages political awareness among high school students. But at Bullard High School, JSA had always meant other things... usually "Just Sex and Alcohol." But after 1996, it meant "Jarrah and Scott Association." Jarrah Euston took an interest in reviving the club, and even got Mr. Horn to be the new sponsor. At the end of the 1996 school year, Papa and 8 students traveled to the Southern State JSA convention, and found their purposes in life.

Jarrah, Scott Dogg (under the name Will Trachman), Paul, Andrew, and Yvette were among those who attended the convention. Not only did they rule any and all debates that they went to, they learned that they ruled the dance floor. JSA dances are an experience like no other, and they vowed to attend as many conventions as possible the next year.

Another important tradition that began at the convention was Good and Plenties. While buying food at a convenience store, Paul and Andrew discovered an unopened box of the candy. After convincing Scott Dogg to chip in, they purchased the entire box (at a discounted rate without sales tax). Over the course of the convention, they consumed the entire box. At all later conventions, boxes of Good and Plenties would be purchased and consumed on a regular basis.

Finally, Gilbert Sai from Merced was born at the convention. One of the panels featured an impromptu speaking competition, in which the Bullard Forensics team members could not resist competing. First, Jarrah gave a speech about how the elbow is the sexist part of the body. Next, Scott Dogg spoke about how debaters don't know what they're talking about (this speech was very similar to the Impromptu round at State where The Brick Joke was used). Finally, Paul got up to speak. When asked his name, he replied "Gilbert Sai, from Merced." After looking at his topic and thinking intently, he was ready to begin. Before the speech, he asked "Since I like to walk around during my speech, could everyone move out of the aisles?" Once they way to the exit was clear, he began.

"Ezekiel 25:17 - The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and goodwill, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper, and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furrrrios anger, those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord, when I lay my vengeance upon thee!" At this point, he reached the door. With a cry of "Sleep Tight, Ya Morons!" he fled the room, never to return. The Bullard section erupted in cheers, while everyone else sat stunned. This speech has been given at every state convention Bullard has attended.

The next year, Bullard attended Fall State with a larger delegation, key additions being Robbie, Steve, and Maureen. This convention was also the birthplace of the infamous "Danging Article" in the JSA newsletter. Scott Dogg's guide to dancing was mislabeled due to a printing error, but still made a huge impact on the JSA community.

Spring State was the last JSA convention for many of the members, and was also the first JSA convention without Papa, who canceled at the last minute. But the students still managed to behave perfectly, under the guidance of President/Dictator Supreme Jarrah and Vice President/Right Hand Man Scott Dogg. Well, at least everyone returned home without being arrested, what more can you ask for?

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